this past week, my family went to the small town of Hot Springs in western North Carolina and stayed at a renovated Victorian house that now serves as a bed and breakfast. I have three word, people; IT WAS AMAZING. The town has an estimated population of about 600, which meant less people, and therefore, not very much noise. Hot Springs was so very peacful; it reminded me of Silent Hill. I know Silent Hill is supposed to be a horrible place, but if you take out the the hell-horror idea, don't add back in the residents, and leave in the falling snow, you've gotta pretty nice place to be: isolated, not a lot people, more nature than concrete, and THAT's what i like. Hot Springs is not entirly isolated because it's about 40 miles from Ashville, one of North Carolina's major cities, and it's got about 3 or 4 gated communities surrounding Hot Springs by a 4 - 5 mile radius.
the fact that made so mystical was 1( the Victorian house 2( the size of the town 3( the town's nightlife (there is a bar at the center of Hot Springs that have a lot of people going there at night and camp grounds about 100 ft away from it, which adds life to the night, but in a peaceful, homely sort of way; this helps with the fact that i'm partially nocturnal) 4( the French Broad River that runs through Hot Springs and a large creek that runs beside it (it's more beautiful during the night in my opinion) 5( the Pisgah National Park of Tennesse (western neighboring state of N.C.) sits right beside Hot Springs, within a walking distance.

we also went horseback riding for 3 hours- it was fun, but i wanted the horse to run. My horse kept trying to eat the grass off the egde of the trail, which was antagonizingly annoying T_T. Daddy wasn't too enthusiastic about the trip; I can't remember if it was while on their honeymoon or not, but my Mum and Dad went horseback riding, and during the trip, the riding instructor and Mum decided to let their horses run, and did so as they climbed up a large hill. Well, my Mum knows all about horses, including how to ride them. My Dad, however, only knew how to care for horses, and had never ridden one in his life before:

up the hill + running horses+plus inexperienced dad = falling OFF the horse
You see, riding-ranch horses are trained to play a constant game of " Follow the Leader" and when my Mum's horse and the instructor's horse took off running, so did my Dad's, and when that happened, not only did my dad not know he was suppose to lean forward while going up hill, he also lost his guard from the sudden surge of movment, and went " boing" off the horse, halfway up the hill. To this day, my Mum still laughs from that.
by the way, my Mum told me this; this happened before i was born.

by the way, it's the the tradtional American holiday of "Memorial Day", so here's to our troops, young and old, and i hope our military and govermental leaders get those in iraq and afghanistan out as soon as possible; we've got kids who need mom and dad; we've got fiancees who need their fiancees; spouses who need their spouses; families who need their family; friends who need their friends. Our soldiers deserve something, and it might as well be a life to keep.

To have sociophobia, or, Social Anxiety Disorder (SAD). I told my therapist that I have been feeling very anxious or excited while at school, and at the end of the day i feel tired and drained and i don't feel like doing my homework. She then asked me, "When do you start feeling anxious, Ginger?" and i thought about, and i came to realize that it seems to be that where ever there are a lot of people, i get very tense and excited, and then she told me, " It's possible that you might have sociophobia". It will probably take a few more sessions before she actually figures out for sure if that's what the problem is.
Also, i'm finally getting over my fear of my crush. That's right people - i'm finally actually TALKING TO HIM. He'll give me this look like "you're srtange" whenever i show up, and he probably does think i'm crazy and weird, but guess what- he's right, i am crazy, figurtivly AND literally. He doesn't seem to mind me talking to him, though, in fact, he seems enjoy me being around, a little. But i'm not going to jump to conclusions - for all i actually know, he's probably just being nice.
To be honest with you guys, i feel kind of empty when i think about school. It seems that school has been getting more scary to me by the day........ it maybe apparent why, but, i just dont know. I guess i feel lonely.........

lately, you guys, i've been feeling very weird...... i've been feeling very happy and calm lately and i don't why. my depression issues seem to be wavering, and well.........i've becom a bit more optimistic. Sometimes i am sad, but it doesn't effect me much. I really don't understand it.
also, i have been accepted to the north carolina school of the arts summer program and i can't wait! 4 weeks at one of the best international art schools in the world, and very soon i'll be going to that school the rest of my two high school years, and ITS GOOD BYE TO YOU, HCHS! YOU CAN KISS MY BUTT! YAHOOOOOOOO!!!!

then i plan to go to collage in england or Japan (if i can find anything or anyone that'll teach me japanese).
also, my history class is extremely boring. I can't express how boring it is. all we do is write in the stupid class. My teacher is fun to be with personally, but as a teacher, he's just boring.

good day peoples
i am here to inform you that i now have an account on FanFiction.net
i don't have anything on there but i will soon. (no, this is not the secret series i mentioned in the last journal - i said "c'est pas ecrive" which is probably bad french there, but it's supposed to mean "it's not written", which tells you somthing, right?........................ it's going to be a comic, you guys T_T)
by the way, the sweet icon down there should also tell you something. right now, i'm thinking about a guy that i've had a crush on for more than a year and a half, aaand.......well, you know, i've been thinking about him more- i can't talk to him, because i'm too damn scared. he knows i like him, and how he found out was an embaressment for me. english isn't his first language ands it's hard to talk to him anyways.......... theres just a lot of things.
i just wish i could be with him.
i don't know what i'm going to do.

all this week i have been working my butt off trying to pass a test in science and at the same time trying to keepup with all the work from my other classes, escepcailly homework and it has worn me out! i hope i passed that test. also my grades have faultered a bit because my lacking, unpredictable memory ability and the fact that i need everything to be spelled out for me before i can acctually understand something (and the fact that i am tired all the time) i really hope that i get good at the end of this 6 weeks be cuase i have working harder than i have been used to, plus, I NEED THOSE GRADES!!!!!!!!!!!

Also good to note that saturday is the day of the party in which i have been invited to by one of my gothic and awsome junior friends, and i am almost finished sewing my costume (i'll take a picture of it and post it later)

now i shall speak some french (try to, anyway).....

J'ai devoir..... le week-end. AHHHHH! JE LE DETESTE!!!!!



ya wanna know what i just said (unless you can speak french)- too bad, 'cause i ain't tellin' ya, HAHAHAHA.
figure it out yourself.

now i'm going to go watch some crap and do my homework........